What is it with all the ominous warnings about how laborious and stressful it is to plan a wedding?

   So far, the only difficulty has been convincing me there's much to worry about. With the guidance of two enthusiastic moms who know what they're doing and seem to enjoy it, things seem to be magically falling into place.

   Not that I'm so easy to work with. Ten minutes into a meeting with the florist and my eyes roll back into my head. I can't seem to focus on the long list of menu choices from the caterer and a recent shopping trip for bridesmaids' dresses sent me gasping for fresh air in the parking lot.

   I care deeply about our wedding. But once we found the location — a sloping field by the ocean on Martha's Vineyard for the ceremony and the local Agricultural Hall for the reception — I figured there wasn't much else to do. Order some food, pay the band, hire a photographer and voila! — the happiest day of our young lives.

   Any married person would cringe at those words, and most do when I say them. I know it's ridiculous to daydream of a dazzling wedding and then fall unconscious when the minutia start to pile up The trouble is, whenever it's time to focus on a particular detail, like the texture of the table linens or the number of rows of chairs at the ceremony, everyone swivels their head and looks to me for guidance. And suddenly I'm not a detail person. Like a spoiled teenager, I shrug my shoulders and gaze off into the distance.

   I am aware how fortunate I am to have had no genuine traumas over the planning of this shebang. Both Jake's and my parents are still happily together, we have a budget that gives us plenty of room and deep down we all know that it's the people in attendance, not the marzipan tulips on the cake, that will make our day memorable. If only I could start the daunting chore of compiling the addresses of those people, then we'd really be in business.

   Alternately swept up and aloof from the madness, I see why some brides chose to turn the entire project over to someone else and why others decide to take it on alone. While I no longer fully believe my original pronouncement that planning this thing would be terrific fun, a flittering excitement builds every time we make forward progress.

   And as each day clicks by, I am that much closer to knowing this thing is really going to happen.