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January 2002 Wedding Lull... by Gill Cheshire ...    There seems to be a definite lull in the wedding plans. I'm sure I should be doing something, but I am not sure what. We have finally ordered and paid for the invitations, settled the final bill for the registry office and ordered the cake. The photographer has been chosen and the music for the ceremony and the reception will be a harpist and flutist who have played for past US presidents and the Royal Family has also been organised.    Planning a wedding so far in advance, you always think you have plenty of time to make all the arrangements. So far it has been relatively quiet and laid back, but you always have doubts as to whether you have missed something. I just can't think what.    We chose our outfits relatively early on in the wedding plans. I have had the opportunity to try the top on as that has already come in. The organza cloak hasn't yet appeared and the gold skirt will not be made until the New Year. So I still have time to lose weight. Andy has chosen his outfit and paid the necessary deposit and I have paid the majority of my outfit off already.    One of the reasons behind settling some of the wedding bills now is that we are concerned that when the wedding day comes, the bill will exceed what we have estimated. Rather than get an enormous bill that we will be unable to settle, we have tried to pay some of it in advance. With some vendors, we don't have a choice - the registry office, for instance, wanted paying now. I do think it is a good idea so that the financial pressure is taken off us.    I have also created a spreadsheet with impressive looking columns that show all the items we believe we need for the wedding, the money we have paid out already versus the estimate of bills we still need to. Everytime we pay something off, the PC is turned on and another entry made. The total then lessens and it doesn't look quite so bad as it did in the beginning. It does allow you to keep an eye on the figures.    Based on the costs we have roughly decided on whom we will invite and whom we won't! However, working up the invite list always causes potential problems and we have already been put in a quandary over this. When I was still single I had a good friend Mary who I used to spend a lot of time with... mainly drinking! However, since she has met a new man (Jack) and they have moved in together, she has changed. Andy met him for the first time when they invited us for dinner. Andy was most unimpressed when Jack spent the whole evening watching the television, even at dinner, and ignored the pair of us. Andy has said that on no account is he to come to the wedding. It's a bit of a difficult situation. I don't think it is appropriate to invite her alone, but we haven't really had the same relationship since Jack came onto the scene and we have absolutely nothing in common now. The wedding list always causes a problem but what can we do?    From the articles I have read it would appear we are not alone. The one distinct advantage we have is that we are paying for the wedding; therefore, we don't have to invite parents' friends that would ordinarily be on the list. It does allow us to have a really private ceremony for our close friends and family and do things the way we want them done rather than the other way around.    So, as you can see we are well on the way to having this wedding planning all sewn up. I am sure I told you in one of my first articles that I was organised and liked to plan things in advance. Planning a wedding is more stress free when you have a longer period of time to arrange things. Although give me a couple of months and it will be a different story.    I wish you all the very best for the year ahead.