October 2001"...I'm not an '80s bride and they're not '80s bridesmaids."
by Valerie Carino
...
Damien thought I was kidding when I told him I found the one. This, of course, was four months ago, more than a year before the wedding. "What if you lose weight? What if you find something better after you spend all your money on this one?"
My poor fiancé didn't know how long I've been around wedding gowns. As a child, I had a notebook full of designs I'd sketched and shared among my friends at the cafeteria table. After college, I landed a job at a consignment shop, where women brought in their designer gowns and rented them so that other brides could afford them. And a year ago, before I took a job in PR and started collecting more freelance gigs, I worked for another bridal store.
I used to talk about Vera Wang like she was my neighbor and spent Saturday mornings watching "Style With Elsa Klensch." I didn't know it then, but I suppose I envied the model who sashayed down the catwalk at the end of each show, because she was the one chosen to debut the bridal gown, a couture fantasy of tulle, satin, silk or lace. I suppose I'll be that girl next year.
...
My advice to brides-to-be: Don't let your fiancé tell you that you're shopping too early. So long as you have a ring, starting the hunt as soon as you can is worth it, and all the more fun because you have more time.
I stumbled across the one about two weeks after we got engaged. My friend, Stephanie, who spotted the strapless organza beauty on a mannequin, convinced me to try it on even though I knew it wouldn't fit. The mannequin was a size 8. I'm a 12.
I bitched at her when the zipper wouldn't budge beyond my lower back. It felt like I was living out one of those Cathy cartoons, admonishing myself for taking that extra slice of pot roast the night before.
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What's worse, these bridal designers - more so than any other clothing designers - don't have a clue about what sizes real women (real women with real appetites) wear. As I told many a bride while working as a bridal consultant, you'll have to go up a size to get the right fit, a comment that no one wants to hear, even the girls who wear a size 4.
Thankfully, this particular gown, despite being too small, was the perfect fit in every other way. Even Steph said, "I think we've found a winner."
Girlfriend was right.
...
When I went to look at myself in the mirror, my mouth went big - a big, wide smile that would stay on my face for the next few days. The A-line silhouette was perfect for my figure, the train wasn't too long, the strapless cut made it modern and the airy organza was precisely the fabric I wanted to wear. But what clinched it more than anything else was the color - "Candlelight" with additional splashes of periwinkle and lilac flowers, and ivy cascading throughout the dress. Because of my bronzed, hula girl skin, people often mistake me for Hawaiian, but I'm actually Filipino-American. I often wear bright colors, such as mint, baby pink, lavender, all those tints you would associate with paradise, polka dot bikinis and Mai Tais. And, almost always, you'll find me with a flower in my hair.
Which is why this gown was made for me. The look is tropical, but not gaudy. Very me. So I ordered the gown the very next week, when it went on sale for $650, down from $850. It's no Vera Wang, but so what. I don't make Vera Wang money anyway and the gown is just as gorgeous.
I left the bridesmaid dresses up to the girls. With two in San Francisco, one in D.C. and another in Hoboken, I assumed it would be a nightmare coordinating the gowns. But now we have those, too.
...
Thanks to the San Francisco girls, Jen and Alice, my bridesmaids paid $55 for their two-piece lilac dresses, which were half off their original price at a designer outlet store. The dress they chose is Kate-Winslet-at-the-Oscars-meets-Moulin-Rouge. It features a bustier top and a long taffeta skirt with a slit up the side. Both girls adored it, and being that they had two different figures, I figured what the heck, as long as they feel their best and look good.
Jen sent me the two other dresses last week so that I could sign off on them before I packed them for Hoboken and D.C. The dresses are stunning, streamlined and complement the maid-of-honor's dress without outshining it.
Thank goodness I'm not an '80s bride and they're not '80s bridesmaids. We'd all be walking down the aisle with teased bangs and wearing sequins, ruffles and teal.
No, I don't think so.
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