Greeting Guests by Julia Smillie

   You've heard of it. You've probably walked through one. You might even have been in one. It's the receiving line, and you're not alone if you're wondering why it exists, how it works and, most importantly, whether or not to have one.

"If you decide to do away with the receiving line, you are still responsible for welcoming each guest personally during the reception. "

   Receiving lines originally existed to let the reception hostess welcome each guest and facilitate introductions to key members of the bridal party. It's a nice - and ancient - tradition, but receiving lines can be time-consuming and even awkward, with extended families. It's not really a surprise (or a shame, say some) that it seems to be fading from all but the most formal wedding receptions. Unfortunately, the point of the receiving line is often overlooked, which means the guests are, too.

   If you do want to stick with tradition, don't line up to greet your guests at the entrance to the reception. Making them wait is simply rude and cranky guests do not make for a fun reception. Instead, decide pick a point in the room where you can form your receiving line upon your arrival. (This is especially helpful if you're taking some photographs after the ceremony). Your guests can get started on the cocktails and hors d'oeuvres before you arrive, which could make far livelier greetings.

   The formal receiving line-up is as follows: mother of the bride, mother of the groom, bride, groom, maid of honor and all the bridesmaids. (The fathers of the couple just get to mingle, lucky dogs.) Today's families are often more complex than the traditional model and deciding who stands where could result in some hurt feelings. So consider this simplified modern line-up: the bride's parents, the bride, the groom and his parents.

   If you decide to do away with the receiving line, you are still responsible for welcoming each guest personally during the reception. (Yes, even your creepy great-uncle Jack.) And although some couples attempt to replace the receiving line by having the DJ introduce the wedding party as they enter the reception, it misses the boat. It's putting pageantry before politeness and giving your guests the shaft.

   Your guests took the time to come out for your big day, probably with a gift underarm, and deserve at least a greeting. Divide and conquer. Mingle with purpose during the cocktail hour or make it a point to visit each table during dinner. In fact, in some Asian cultures, the bride and groom share a toast with each table, which is a nice idea — until you think about how you'll be feeling by table seven.

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES:
Guide to the Receiving Line